And you're thinking the only way it could get better is if the dessert was like an intimate breakfast which be feeding each other warm sticky cinnamon buns or a rally fricking good apple fritter or a krispy creme right outta the line but it is dinner time and it is time for getting busy with porn and fried chicken and it is good, so good it is Gooooooooood with a capital G and those long oooooooo's that they should be spaced out and pronounced "G oo o o o o o o o o o dah!" in that deep husky oh yeah that's the spot bebe voice of yours.
Now maybe you are part of the 10% of the crowd that doesn't like porn but likes fried chicken. Or maybe you are one of those people that thinks fried chicken is bad and porn is peachy or maybe you are one of the few that thinks fried chicken is really yucky and prithee who will save the children from all buying all the porn and you actually approve of Walmart banning like Playboy and stuff 'cause you know, porn it's icky and people should be eating salads anyway - But I am hedging my bet that you are one of those people that... Hey wait a minute maybe you are one of the damn selfish bastards who would steal the last piece of chicken selfishly, one of those lecherous types that gives dirty perverts a bad name, the kind of person who wears white socks with black shoes and has your gym pants hiked up a bit to high which isn't a bad thing necessarily but the way you do it is just wrong... You, yes you the one who doesn't know how to use porn in any good ways.... * sigh *
No, no, no. You are all missing the point porn and fried chicken is the moment, that oh so rare ultimate hedonistic moment of divine indulgence... No, well I trust at least YOU, yes you, you know what I am talking about don't you? You know that PNFC is something divine and warm and wonderful... More addictive than crack the true PNFC connoisseur knows, though that it is such a scrumptious *mmmmm * so insanely delicious, one that causes the stars to align and washes away all the negative dogma... nay nay PNFC shouldn't be tried by you amateurs more than once every six months.
And such is the dark side of Porn & Fried Chicken that few here are brave enough, * pause * strong enough, to stomach talking about... When PNFC turns into a crutch, when you find yourself driving by KFC on Tuesdays... 'cause I mean who wants to cook and on Thursdays because it was a bitch of a day and my boss is such a jerk and hell yeah I deserve a little extra crispy good loving tonight, and you start focussing about the little details and why the hell are her feet dirty anyway and you are late for work from rewinding and you start going out of your way driving the extra ten miles to the other side of town looking for the Swedish stuff while you drop the old lady off at Walmart to buy that ten gallon jar of pickles for $3. You start doing searches for PNFC Clubs meeting in weekly NY and for some reason you can't figure out your favorite money shots bring just don't seem to be the same - Things start changing at work and you feel left behind. You shake your tiny fist and say this is not the way things were supposed to be. And now look at you, it's getting so you can't even see your toes and you have gravy stains on your favorite shirt.
No, see you missed it. You see, it starts with those times when the weather is clear, perfect sunshine, the traffic is light, the music; loud groove bliss and you crack the window a bit. And your butt is squirming and your head feels light and the world gathers to feel effortless and seamless like your own private little oyster - and you are happy. It starts with those moments of hot crossed sticky gooey buns. It starts right here with you, you woman, wearing your sexuality like perfume not a hatchet. It starts right now with you man, being more mellow and a positive influence on others. Because if you don't do it no one else will. Because if you do do it someone else won't. Because there is nothing truly preventing you from saturating yourself in the hot steamy goodness of why the hell not.
It starts with these amazing simple little moments of small positive excess. And you know, somehow it just grows fluid and ethereal with a dab of clarity, and even though your cynical side knows it won't last and knows the world is full of suckiness here is a perfect little moment to savor. And then just for a minute, life has an amazing crystalline quality to it. And sure it's only a little moment but revel in it, that's the point. Sure it will be fleeting, revel in it, for this is where it starts. Revel in it. That giddy moment of *fugh yeah! * and you start seeing them more you know. That moment of wow. no shit that's really clear what else am I wrong about? The moment of well, hey no big deal, that problem; you know it isn't that big of a deal. And hey! How about trying that... if only my lover was here to enjoy this moment, and who cares about that bitch in accounting and you think if only the whole world new about porn and fried chicken and could just relax and how much better everything would be with PNFC once every six months.
(And such is the tao, according to the squeegie)